Wednesday, August 3, 2011

scared shitless

I got all my meds delivered via FedEx today. One of them is administered vaginally??? The reality of the next month is hitting me and it is scary. There are a lot of shots and a lot of pills. Have I ever told you that I am terrified of shots? I think the most terrifying thing of this whole experience is the gamble. I am not a gambler but this is the biggest gamble I can imagine. It is not only the money that you are gambling but your emotions and your future. And I desperately want to win.


  1. The gamble is what makes it so scary for me, too. I am decidedly not a risk taker and IVF seems like the biggest risk I've ever taken.

    They say to close your eyes and leap but I think close your eyes and take it one step at a time is better. Don't think about the big picture but think about each individual step along the way. I think it will make it easier.

  2. Gosh I hear you. I am not a gambler at all and I felt like I threw everything I owned out on the blackjack table when I did IVF.
    It's crazy what we will do isn't it?

  3. Yep, I remember blogging something very similar when I read "insert vaginally" All of those meds were so intimidating! Here's what helped me... counting down and checking off "hurdles" with the biggest moment being the beta. None to freeze but one to stick, so glad we took the gamble and hope you win too! Best of luck!