Some days I know that I need to talk about what is going on, which is why I started this blog. I have never told my husband, my family or my friends about that fleeting thought, I am scared of their reaction.
I was watching Eat, Pray, Love last night, it struck a chord with me. I want to take control of my life and emotions again, to be the person I used to be. I don't think I can be that person but I need to try and morph into a different person. One who can juggle infertility with emotional stability.
I took a positive step yesterday. I made an appointment at Stanford. I have put it off because it is the last step in deciding where I will do IVF, it is the last step in my last step in infertility. It scared me. I got past the fear and am moving forward. A positive step.